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Players Paid In A Casino’s Own Token Are Up Sharply, Measured In That Token

Holders of VAB, a token the crypto casino Velvet Abacus issues and prices itself, are 300 percent ahead. In dollars, the picture is still loading.

By Bartholomew Push, Markets and Data Editor

1 min read

Three casino chips, illustrated
Placeholder artwork

Players at Velvet Abacus, an offshore crypto casino that pays its jackpots in its own token, are having the best year in the platform’s history, according to a dashboard published by Velvet Abacus.

The dashboard puts the median player up 300 percent, measured in VAB, a token the casino issues, prices and accepts back. Our analysis, which also used the dashboard because there is nothing else to use, found the figure accurate to the decimal.

Two charts, one balance

Plotted in VAB, a typical player’s balance climbs steadily from January, a line so clean that two of our editors asked whether it had been drawn with a ruler. Plotted in dollars, the same balance falls by 91 percent over the same months. Laid on top of each other the two lines form a large X, which the casino’s community manager shared with the caption “bullish.”

There is nothing wrong with a currency that only one shop accepts. It is called a voucher. The innovation here is that the voucher goes down.

Dr. Helena Voss, Institute for Probable Outcomes

What VAB can be exchanged for

  • Spins at Velvet Abacus
  • Bonus spins at Velvet Abacus, after wagering
  • More VAB, at a rate set each morning by a man called Kristof
  • Dollars, in principle

Asked when dollar withdrawals would launch, the casino said the feature was “on the roadmap” and attached the roadmap, which is also priced in VAB.

Filed under

  • Crypto
  • Casinos
  • Analysis

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SatireGambling Paper is satire. Its stories are fiction, its quotes are invented, and any resemblance to real people or companies is parody.

Written by

Bartholomew Push

Markets and Data Editor

Bartholomew turns numbers into charts and charts into disappointment. He holds a degree in statistics, which he says has ruined gambling for him.

All stories by Bartholomew Push